Nobody's Laughing . . .

This whole night time thing with the kids and the bedwetting and the being stupid would be hilariously funny if it wasn't so stupid.

Last night was Mr4's turn to be the silly bugger.

At some stage of the night he wet the bed, and didn't change the sheets.

Now if you live in Perth you would know that it got cold last night, really cold! Roughly 6degrees at sunrise I think.

When Mr4 got up this morning after spending the night in cold wet blankets it's pretty obvious to say that he was cold.

In fact while eating his weetbix he was shaking and his lips were blue.

I shoved him into a hot shower and got him dressed with jumpers socks long pants etc.

He was still blue around his whole mouth and shaking.

I sat him on the couch wrapped up in a massive queen sized quilt for 20mins.

He was still blue.

Mum got him a heat pack and stuffed it under the blanket with him.

The blueness was gone but he was still shaking.

We got into the car to take Miss5 to school and I turned the heater on to 28 degrees and he held his heat pack the whole way.

By the time we arrived at the school he had finally stopped shaking and his colour was back to normal. But he was still pretty cold. By now it was still only 10degrees.

By the time we got home he had another 20 minutes wrapped up in the he quilt and finally he was ok to get moving and start playing.

Seriously though what a silly boy!! I have this feeling that my kids do these things to TRY and make me crazy. And it's safe to say it's working!!

Mumma's gone crazy!!!!

Crazy Boy wrapped up in the blanket 

Stubborn As A Mule

I thought I would share another little episode from Miss5 that we have had over the last couple days.

But first a quick update on last night.
It continued pretty badly she kept getting out of bed asking to go to the toilet, for more blankets, asking if it was time to wake up etc...

3.10am she got up and went to the toilet. And at breakfast this morning she told me she had wet the bed again... Well I didn't hear the alarm go off after the first time. I dropped her at school and came home to investigate the bed. We had literally run out of ALL blankets and I was curious to see what she was sleeping with. As I lifted up the mat to straighten up her bed I noticed a giant wet patch UNDER THE MAT. Now let me just explain, if she wet the bed there is a sheet, with the thick rubber mat underneath and then a bottom sheet. So there is NO WAY any wee should have gotten under the mat....unless she moved the mat to pee so it would set the alarm off.....
You gotta give her credit, she's a stubborn bugger!!

Anyway onto my real story.
Yesterday when I picked Miss5 up from school her teacher said to me that her homework reading has been going really well, she's been a gold star reading for something like 7 weeks. The teacher asked Kaitlyn last week to move up to the harder books. She refused. Again this week the teacher asked Miss5 to move up to the harder books. Again Kaitlyn point blank refused and by the sounds of it was a bit rude to the teacher about it. The teacher asked if I could have a talk to her at home.

So last night when we sat down to do the nightly reading I said "if you're a gold star reader again this week, I'm going to tell the teacher that you need to move up to the harder books, I want to see you reading some really good books, cos these easy ones are too easy and getting boring" Miss5 looked at me, agreed with what I said.

Well that was easy you might think.

Oh but just wait-remember she's stubborn she's super intelligent and she doesn't want to move up to the next level of books.

We got her book out to do the nightly reading and she sat there playing with her hands and wouldn't read. Reckoned she couldn't read the word. The first word was 'the' which is the first sight word she ever learnt. I told her the word and thought we could keep going.
She wouldn't.
She knows that if she's a gold star reader this week she has to have a harder book, so she's going to do everything she can NOT to be a gold star reader....clever huh?!?

I had a chat with the teacher this morning about what happened last night and the teacher told me no matter what she's going to tell Kaitlyn she needs to have a harder book next week...BUT she's going to get one of the easy books to put in the hard box...sounds back to front?!? Well I thought so too. I thought she should be putting a hard book in the easy box.

But the reason is. The teacher will tell her to get the easy book out of the hard box. Kaitlyn will bring it home and read it easily. Then she will get used to the idea that she CAN read harder books. It will hopefully get her over the initial fear of failure that she can't read the hard books. If we have progress then the teacher will give her one of the actual harder books and it will hopefully give Miss5 the confidence to keep reading...without ever needing to know the difference!!


Seriously though, it would just be so much easier if she wasn't so stubborn.

All this work just to get a 5 year old to read a book from the grey box instead of the red box...it's ridiculous!

Somebody Get Me A Straight Jacket. . . In Pink!!

I thought it was time to update you all on the bedwetting situation in this house.

3 weeks ago we went to the continence clinic and were finally put on the alarm program.
We brought home a mat to put on her bed that hooks up to an alarm.

The nurse demonstrated how loud the alarm is. It's BLOODY loud!! It was so loud in fact it scared the absolute crap out of Miss5.

We took it home and hooked it up.

I was awake early hours of the next morning waiting for the alarm to go off. It's so loud I knew it would scare me if it went off while I was in a deep sleep.
To my surprise it didn't go off.
Then the next night and the next night and the next night...still no alarm. I was surprised. But I was starting to think there was more to it than that. She was scared of the alarm, the sound was so loud and so shocking it actually scared her. She was literally scared into being dry.

For the whole two weeks she was dry-14 dry nights in a row. Thank God for that blessing!!! It was awesome. But during this time I also NEVER mentioned bedwetting. I didn't praise the good or say anything about the bad. Because I have noticed that whenever it's mentioned whether good or bad she will wet the bed the next night.
For the second week I turned the alarm off but didn't tell her I had done it. I wanted to see if she could do it. And she did.

Last week we went back to the clinic and the nurse told us to keep the mat on the bed and turn the alarm off..pretty much what I had already been doing but this time Kaitlyn knew the alarm would be off.

So home we came. 5 nights we had before our next appointment and 2 of those nights were wet!
And after we were doing so well!!!

I honestly believe that this issue isn't anything to do with wetting the bed. I think it's a control issue. I think she's proving that I might be able to control what she eats and wears and plays with but SHE is the only one that can control whether or not she's dry at night.
The nurse at the clinic 100% agrees with me. Kaitlyn knows exactly what she's doing. She's playing mind games with me. Basically she's being a stubborn bitch. (Yes I did just call her a bitch)

Today we went back to the clinic and the nurse busted her. I love the nurse, she's strict she's a straight talker and she doesn't accept kaitlyns crap. While the nurse was talking to her Miss5 was digging her fingernails into her skin on her face. Pinching so hard it was leaving marks on her. She didn't want to listen to the nurse. She didn't care that it's gross waking up in a yucky bed. She didn't care when the nurse said she was disappointed because she knows Miss5 can do better than that.

Tonight has by far been the worst night yet.
At 7pm both kids went to the toilet and then straight to bed. I told them they had been to the toilet and therefore didn't need to get up and go for a long time (another one of Miss5's games is getting up anywhere from 5-10 times in the first hour she's in bed to 'go to the toilet') I told her she wasn't to come out of her room.
No sooner had I sat down than she got out. I got up explained she had already been and to go to bed and she wasn't allowed out again for a long time-she had already been to the toilet.

She went back to bed and squeezed out the tiniest bit of wee onto the mat. It set off the alarm for the first time EVER!! She came out and told me she wet the bed. I told her it's her job to deal with it (that's part of the program, she needs to change the bed herself and she's not allowed to come out to me). She went back into her room to deal with it and I could hear her mumbling something to her brother. I knew she was trying to get him to do something stupid by the way she was talking.
2 minutes later Mr3 walked out. "Mummy I wet the bed too" he proudly told me.
"Deal with it" I said. I was fuming, that little cow had talked her brother into wetting the bed.

Now both of them have had to change their beds. They are both out of pajamas and blankets because there is not enough in mums house to keep us going for long. I have no idea what they have on their beds, and to be honest I don't care.

It took over 10 minutes for them to change their beds and get back into bed. They were talking and laughing and giggling about changing their beds and wearing new pajamas.

2 minutes later Miss5 walked out AGAIN to go to the toilet (I'll add that she went to the toilet while she was changing her bed) this was 3 times in less than 15 minutes. So I sent her back to bed again, as the nurse has instructed me to. I copped a mouthful of abuse from her.

By this stage I was just about ready to lose my shit. I was shaking and ready to throttle her. WHY does she have to be like this?!? WHY does everything have to be such a power struggle. WHY has she turned into the worlds biggest bitch since we have been living at my mums place. WHY has she turned from my beautiful girl into a rude, moody, lying little shit.

I KNOW that things are different here, without daddy, living with Grandma, a new baby coming and moving to Tom Price soon. But there is absolutely NO EXCUSE for the shit I've had to put up with from her lately. EVERY SINGLE TIME I pick her up from school by the time we get home she's told me she doesn't like me at least twice....usually 3-4 times. She won't take any instructions from me. She lies about almost everything. She's just turned into this horrible person, someone I don't even recognise. Someone I don't like. Someone that I don't want to spend any time with.

We have been through so much with Miss5, she's had so many issues with her anxiety and OCD. And it's been tough dealing with those issues at times. But absolutely nothing compares to the full on abuse and disrespect I have been copping lately.

Finally 40 minutes later things have only just gone quiet in the kids room.

I sat on the couch and had a good cry for about 15 of those minutes. I've stopped shaking with anger and I've stopped crying now.

Oh look as I write that sentence here she is-out of bed again. Came to tell me she needs to go to the toilet.

She has no respect for the nurse and the rules of this program-she KNOWS the rules, she chooses to ignore them. I'm also nervous that now she's set the alarm off once she will be 'used to' the noise and won't mind wetting the bed at night time....

All I want is my girl back. I want to enjoy her company again and I want her bloody bed to be dry!!!!

Chubby Bubby No More. . .

Why is it that a Drs appointment is never just that simple in our family?!?

Today Mr3 was off to the Dr. It was a fairly straightforward appointment. He has frequent nose bleeds in summer time, and even with the cooler weather has still had a few. As we are moving to Tom Price where there is a never ending summer I thought it was time to do something about it.

I wanted to get his nose cauterised.

Problem number 1: the Drs surgery no longer had the equipment to do this themselves.

Problem number 2: I got a referral for a private specialist to do the job-only it costs $160 just for the consult!!! Argh!

Problem number 3: while getting his height and weight checked (just general checkup) the Dr discovered Mr3 has only gained 1kg in an entire year!! Woah!!
I wish I could only gain a kilo a year.
So his weight has dropped off the scales a fair bit.
A little bit too much to just ignore.

Problem number 4: PMH no longer takes outside referrals for their dieticians

Problem number 5: getting into a private dietician on short notice (before we move away in 6 weeks) was fairly hard work, I had to plead my case and tell them all about moving house and being pregnant and then they felt sorry for me and booked me in.

Problem number 6: a private dietician isn't free like PMH is-$120 for that one!!

It was quite an outing to the Drs. I'm now feeling like I can see money rolling out of our bank and it's added a few extra appointments to our already busy next few weeks. Trying to squeeze in as much as possible before this bub comes and we leave.

 This whole weight gain thing is completely out of the blue. I mean Mr3 has always been a shorty but his height and weight are now way too out of wack and in all honesty gaining only 1kg in a year is crazy-and he hasn't just been sick or anything to lose weight.

A couple years ago we did this same thing with Miss5 because she was eating TONNES and not gaining weight. At the time she was too young to test for a gluten intolerance or much else and now she seems to be plodding along fine. Although I did figure out the white bread addiction around the same time and have banned white bread ever since then-so maybe that was part of it?!?

Mr 3 eats an enormous amount as well, drinks roughly a litre of water a day (or more on hot days)  and doesn't over-exercise (if that is even a thing.) So it's a bit bizarre his weight has dropped off so much.

It seems that my kids just enjoy being born big...and from then on they don't grow much. I've got two short little skinny kids. But I had two very big, very chubby babies! I wish they were born small and then grew!!

Oh well I guess I have to expect the unexpected with these little Currie's I've got....after all they do take after their mummy!

EOFY-Budget Time!!

As most of you know I'm slightly OCD (ok maybe a bit more than slightly).
But hey, everyone has their own quirks about them. I'm just happy mine include budgeting!!

And with our ever expanding family, soon to be two adults and 3 children, a budget is a bloody great idea to help us save money.

The end of financial year is coming. And as my baby is due July 3rd I thought I would get organised a few weeks early this year.

I thought I would start by showing you my 'budget spreadsheet' and then explaining how it all works.
It's such a great way to keep track of everything, and seeing where your money goes.

So this is my budget book-yes I know that the computer makes a better spreadsheet. I use my computer for everything else but I just can't seem to swap my budget over to the technology world!

The headings I use are:

GROCERIES- this is pretty self explanatory

JUNK GROCERIES- these are all the unneeded packets of chips, chocolate biscuits, soft drink. Basically just food you don't NEED.

ESSENTIALS-is for all the miscellaneous things that are a NEED. Some examples of the items I put under this heading are; dog food (which I don't buy with my groceries, otherwise you could put it under that heading. Stationary. Birthday and Christmas presents for family/friends. Pull-ups. Bulk laundry powder, school supplies, school fees, Weed killer.) basically things that you need to pay for but don't fit into any other category.

NON ESSENTIALS- this column is for your WANTS. We include books, DVDs, trips to the zoo, bunch of flowers, toys unrelated to gift giving, beer. Also include things like pay tv, makeup accessories, car parts (non essential) etc in this column.

VET- it's good to keep track of how much our pooch is costing us (steadily increasing with his age!!)

PETROL-you will be amazed how much you spend each year, and how much you can save when you think about it!

EATING OUT-include takeaway, morning cup of coffee with friends, afternoon tea at the local cafe, eating out at restaurants etc. basically any time you eat away from home (unless of course you pack it yourself!)

MEDICAL-some of you may not need this column. For us our medical bills are huge! I keep track of doctors appointments, chemist trips, prescription medication costs, visits to the physio etc in this column.

CLOTHES AND ACCESSORIES- clothes, shoes, socks, jocks, bras, hats, beanies, boots, thongs etc.

TOOLS-something we need to help hubby with his tool allowance budget. In his job, as a heavy duty mechanic, he goes through LOTS of tools. Sometimes a couple thousand dollars a year. So we keep track of this.

BILLS- this is probably my favourite tip for anyone. At the end of each financial year I tally up ALL our bills. Life insurance, power, water, gas, drivers license, health insurance, car insurance, any loan or credit card repayments, phone and internet, school fees, mortgage/rent and average costs of car services. I work out the weekly, fortnightly, monthly and yearly total costs of these. As we get paid fortnightly, each fortnight I put aside that amount of money needed. That way as soon as a bill comes in I know the money is already sitting in our separate account ready for me. Also all my direct debits come out of this account so I know what's in our "everyday" account is for us. This is one of the biggest tips I could give anyone wanting to start a family budget. It spreads out the cost of everything across the year and makes things that little bit easier. I know that when I get a bill come in that there is already money waiting for us, I don't have to scrounge around and cut back on the groceries to pay the bill.

KIDS ACCOUNT- each fortnight we put aside a small amount for each of our children to give to them when they are 18 (or 21 I haven't decided, depending on their maturity levels!)


I then tally up the weekly sub totals for each category and keep a running 'year to date' total for each category.

Every 3 months I match it all up with our wages. Writing our net income, total spendings, total bills etc and hope it all comes out right! And so far it has all matched up perfectly.


This will be my third financial year using this budget method. The first year was a real shock to us both. We spent over $3000 on petrol, $12,000 on groceries!! Who knew?!?
It really opened our eyes. And because it's written down in plain sight in front of you, it's easy to tell which areas you need to make cut backs in. For example if your spending $10,000 a year on non essential items you could look at having a finance goal of decreasing that by $2000 for the next financial year. If your medical costs (like ours) are nearing $4000 a year then you can look at what areas you can make cut backs in so that you can afford this more easily, or you could look that your private health insurance to see which areas you want to add, or take away from your policy.

At the beginning of each new budget book I attach a copy of the last financial years totals for each category. It helps keep me motivated and on track. If I can see us creeping up too close to last years huge junk food bill I know it's time to cut back and rethink how I can change that (by making more homemade foods, packing snacks when going out etc).
I also highlight the 2 or 3 areas where I really want to make cutbacks. Eg. last financial year I highlighted our credit card-because I really wanted to get rid of that. For this coming financial year I'll high light the loan for our new car, so we can focus on paying that off as fast as possible.


It seems like such a hard task to write down where EVERY SINGLE DOLLAR goes. But really it's easy-if I can get my hubby to start keeping his receipts then anyone can do it!!
Even now while we are living 1600kms apart he still sends me a quick text saying "$47 at Coles, $18 on beer"
Once your get into the habit, it becomes just that. A habit, like any other habit you pick up. It's easy, every night you spend literally like 2 minutes quickly jotting down your receipts into each category. Every three months I do a year to date total and compare with our wages and once a year I set up our new budget book.

It doesn't take long, and once you see where all your money goes you will be glad. You can save thousands just by watching your money. Fuelling up your car on Wednesday can save you hundreds per year- it's the cheapest day of the week.


That's our family budget. It's been the most amazing 2 years doing this. Hubby is completely sold on the idea and is always asking for updates. Going into our third year we have added a couple of extra category's (the tools, junk groceries and vet were not on the original list).

When making your own family budget you can have any headings you want.

Give it a try for a year and see where it takes you.

You might must surprise yourself. Or you might die of shock as hubby and I did our first year!!

Another Day, Another Trip To Hospital. . . *sigh*

Soooo we DID end up in the hospital tonight.

In case you haven't read my Facebook post here's the story: I was at the shops with Mr3 this morning with him in the trolley. He wasn't listening to me and continued to sit on the edge of the trolley instead of inside the trolley. I stopped to look at something and over the edge he went, head first onto the hard floor.

He screamed.

I swore.

Thank goodness we had finished shopping already so I carried this screaming child sitting on my bump, back through the shop to the car.

25 minutes later he had calmed down. I checked him out-no bruise no egg on his head so off we went.

The rest of the day he was fine, playing, running around. He even went to his tennis class.

I was pretty pleased we had escaped a trip to the hospital.



By 6pm he started complaining of a headache and saying he felt sick in his tummy.

Bugger!

I called health direct and they advised me to get to a hospital.
By the time we got there my little man was a little bit off with the fairies. He just wasn't right and he was pretty lethargic and grumpy.

When we got in to see the dr she looked him over and pronounced him a silly bugger but not brain dead. Everything checked out ok. His arms and legs were moving, he could walk and see fine. No blood or goo oozing from anywhere..

So we have been sent home with the instruction sheet for head injuries. A piece of paper I know almost off by heart-my kids have done some good head injuries in their time!

He seems to be a lot better now. Obviously he has a headache-it was a big fall and a bloody hard ground to hit so I'm not surprised he has a headache.

I didn't manage to escape a trip to the hospital this time but at least my little man is looking better.


And next time, maybe he will listen when I tell him to sit IN the trolley and not on the edge!!

Boys will be boys...

An Ode To Grandma's

This blog is an ode to all the grandmas out there...it was supposed to be a Mother's Day post but I couldn't figure out how to upload the photos until it was too late!! Oops....finally got it sorted :-)

My mum (bottom pic) has always been around. She's been the main family member in my kids life (apart from hubby and I) and they both have an amazing relationship with her.
They go for sleepovers on school holidays. They make play dough, they play computer games. They make lots of mess and they read stories together. They get SPOILT!!
Basically they get along like grandparents should with their grandchildren.
But it's always been easy for them to have a good relationship. Mum works at a school so is always around on school holidays. For the last 4 years we have lived close to mum and mum has been our main babysitter for the monsters. They know Grandma well and enjoyed spending 20 minutes trying to find her the perfect bunch of flowers for Mother's Day.

My mother in law is a little bit harder to explain.
Sadly she passed away just before my hubby turned 18. She had a long and horrible battle with cancer.
 I never met her. My kids have never met her.
And yet I still find it so important for them to know her and have a relationship with her.
When hubby and I first got together I didn't know much about Elaine Currie. I knew she was Phil's mum and clearly a very strong woman to put up with 4 kids (the twin boys at the end being disastrously cheeky buggers!)
When Miss 5 came along we decided Elaine had to meet her very first grandchild. So when Kaitlyn was only weeks old we went to the cemetery and said g'day.
When Mr 3 came along (after he was out of hospital roughly 4 weeks of age) he was taken to the cemetery to meet his grandma.
Since then we have made numerous trips to the cemetery with the kids.
They choose flowers for her. They talk to her, and Mr 3 comes up with some very cheeky answers that are 'from grandma'
They know she lives in heaven with the angels, but they know she's still important and that you can still talk to her.
On her birthday last year we made the trip to the cemetery. Miss 5 wanted to make a cake "because it's grandma's birthday!" So I made cupcakes, then Mr3 decided you can't have cake without candles so we brought candles and a lighter and off we went. After a chorus of 'happy birthday' we chomped into the cake and left a cupcake there for grandma. We even let her blow the candles out (thank god for the wind!)
On Mother's Day Grandma Currie also gets a card and last year we even planted a rose bush next to her.
I remember one time the kids made a card and by the next time we visited (about 4 months later) the wet soggy remnants of the card were still there, the kids were absolutely ecstatic!

Miss5 likes to stand the flowers up "like in a garden"

No matter where your mum or grandma is, try to remember them on Mother's Day. Let your kids have the relationship they need to with their grandma. Even if you think it's silly to take a cupcake to a grave and sing happy birthday and blow out the candles it's an important thing for your children.
Both our kids love both their grandma's....ones just a lot easier to explain than the other. Both relationships are equally important though.
Even though I never met my mother in law and my kids never met their second grandma we all still have our own kind of bond and relationship with her. We may not have play dough and story time with Grandma Currie but we do have photos and stories from Phil. We have our visits to the cemetery and cards, flowers, and cake!

We have memories with a person we never met.

And that's pretty amazing.

Raising A Little Boy

"Hey Mum, look what I found" is usually never a good sentence starter-especially when coming from a little boy.

Being a mum of a 3 almost 4 year old boy has been an experience. Sometimes gross, sometimes funny, sometimes worthy of heart failure.

Today was a gross one.

Mr 3 was quietly eating lunch after playing with a curly blue dress up wig.

He picked up something off the wig and turned to me with a smile on his face "hey Mum, look what I found"

He tried to give me something that looked like a stick. I didn't take it but instead looked at the weird shape of this 'stick'

"Bradley, that's a dead lizard get rid of it!!" I screamed and swatted the dead lizard out of his hand.

He screamed, I tried not to gag and Zac looked mildly interested, like the lizard would make a good meal.

Mr3 was sent to the bathroom to scrub himself from head to toe while I inspected the lizard. It was dead, and dried up and slightly shrivelled looking-soooo gross!!!

I had flashbacks to the time Miss5 was 15 months old and very proudly brought me a dead bird from the backyard.

After he was disinfected Mr3 came back, keeping a close eye out for the lizard. By then hubby had flushed that little lizard down the toilet!

With the drama over Mr3 went back to stuffing his face with his lunch... All in a days work for a boy right??

To Serve And To Protect. . . Or Not??

I'm one of 'those' people that sits at the park or shopping centre and says quietly to myself "I hate other peoples kids."

Today is a great example of me keeping my mouth shut while wanting to knock someone's kids out.

But not because they were playing unfairly, pushing in line, speaking rude, throwing loud tantrums in shopping centres. That's why I usually say I hate other peoples kids.

Today was different.

It started when I picked the kids up from school. They got into the car and I asked the 'mum questions'
"How was your day?"
"What did you do at school?"
"Who did you play with?"
Mr3 is always happy to answer these questions but Miss5 usually refuses (and she has since she started 3 yr old kindy)

Today was a whole other story. Miss5 started mouthing off about police officers.
I would just like to say here that I have the MOST respect for police. I think they do their job,  I agree with high speed police chases, I agree with speed cameras etc etc. I don't have a problem with them. I never bad mouth them and I never blame them for things going wrong when bad people do silly things (eg high speed chase ends up with the bad guy dead, bad guy shouldn't be doing something illegal is my theory)
So hearing my daughter bad mouth police was pretty strange.
She was telling me how police do the wrong thing, how they are naughty and how sometimes they kill good people. WOAH!! This was pretty serious stuff she was getting into. WHERE had this come from??

I tried the gentle approach. I never want my kids to fear police officers, I'm not one of those parents that say "if you don't brush your teeth the police will tell you off." I never threaten my kids with police because if they ever are in trouble I want them to go to the police, to seek help and not be afraid of being sent to jail for not brushing their teeth.
I calmly explained to Miss5 that police have an important job and that job is to ALWAYS do the right thing. They are never naughty, they don't do the wrong thing and they don't kill people. I told her it's their job to make sure everyone does the right thing, and if SOMEONE ELSE is being naughty the police take that person away to teach them to be good again. I explained that if people steal things, or break into houses or hurt people the police are there to HELP. I told that if she ever got lost or hurt or someone was doing something bad that she could talk to police and they would help her.

Miss5 told me I was lying.

Well that got me pretty pissed off. I was actually thinking "some white trash little shit from her school has been mouthing off, obviously they heard their white trash parents talking bad about the police." I was getting so angry. I didn't want my daughter to form this opinion of police and dammit I wanted her to believe me when I told her important things.

I asked who had been telling these horrible stories at school. I was ready to hear about a particular bully I know of, instead she said "my teacher."

Well you could have knocked me over with a feather. On Fridays there is a different teacher, a relief teacher, in the classroom and I'm not familiar with them.

But this. Well this should NEVER be said by any teacher. It's their job to teach children, not bad mouth police officers in the classroom. I don't know how this topic came up at school or why they felt the need to say that police officers were naughty and killed good people but I am definitely not impressed.

The conversation ended soon after this statement from her, because no matter what I said she refused to believe me, she told me I was lying and that her teacher was always right.

I myself, could quite happily whack the teacher over the head next time I see them.

Over the next few weeks I'll be sure to make a point of saying how police officers are good and helpful. Casually slipping it into normal conversation, or when we see a police car I will be pointing out that they are on their way to help someone, I want Miss5 to get the message that they are there to protect and help people and to take the bad guys away. I'm worried that if she doesn't change her mind, she could end up in a bad situation and not want to call the police later in life.

She's too young to have such a negative view on things like that.

This afternoon I was all prepared to start hating someone's child. And that could be the case-maybe another child brought up the topic, but I'm really disappointed that Miss5's answer was "my teacher" that doesn't give me much faith sending her to school next week. . .

What My Wedding Rings REALLY Mean To Me. . .

Being a mum is hard. Being a teen mum is extra hard-but for very different reasons than you might think.

I was 18 when I had Miss5...it wasn't in the plan-that much is for sure. But it's no secret. I don't hide the fact I was a young mum, I don't avoid the topic. I tell people "I was 18" but I'm also the first to admit its a hard trek being so young.

And NOT for the reasons you would think.

When I was pregnant the first time around I moved out of home for the first time. Hubby (who was only boyfriend at the time) and I found a tiny little house in a slightly dodgy suburb. We weren't married, in fact we weren't even engaged.
I refused to have a shotgun wedding-that's not the kind of person I am. Even though we were planning on moving in together before I found out I was pregnant I still wasn't going to rush into getting married, and thankfully no one put much pressure on us. Although plenty of young mums do have that pressure.

I may not have had that pressure from people I knew, but I did get a lot of criticism from complete strangers.

I would be out doing the food shopping or out anywhere in public and people would stare at me.
As soon as they had finished judging me for looking young and being pregnant their eyes would automatically go straight to my ring finger...and it was empty.

I often heard the whispers "so young" "not even married" "I bet the father ran away" "probably going to be a dole bludger all her life"

Seriously how judgemental?

I also lost almost ALL my friends when they found out about my pregnancy. Being pregnant at 18 wasn't 'cool' or 'fashionable' or it certainly wasn't 'fun.' So we lived a pretty quiet life. Something that I do find amusing though is all the girl friends I had ditched me quicker than you can say catchya! But all the boy friends I had hung around. In fact the night before I went into labour we were at a boy friends house having a catch up and giggling about the size of my tummy! You would think teenage guys would be the ones running.

I also had random abuse hurled at me from people walking past or driving by: "slut" "close your legs whore" really, it was just charming.

Even when I had appointments at the beauty salon or hair salon the people would say to me "how old are you" when I told them I was 18 the first thing out of their mouth was "is the dad around" because apparently a guy would never stick around for his 18 yr old pregnant girlfriend and unborn child!!

When Mr3 came along we were living in the country so the judgement wasn't as bad. However when people found out my age the VERY FIRST question out of their mouth was "is it to the same dad?" EVERY single time it was the same. When I would answer yes they all breathed a sigh of relief and said "that's ok then" as if I wouldn't be judged as harshly because both kids had the same dad.

There was also a lot of staring at my ring finger and asking when I was going to get married. I would always say "when we are ready." Marriage is very special to us and not something we wanted to rush into.

I still copped a lot of random abuse from strangers. I remember one time I was ready to put both kids down for a nap and was in the middle of cooking. I only had 1 egg and needed 2. So I quickly grabbed both the kids and ran down to the shop. Neither of them had shoes on but they were both in a trolley and clearly ready for bed. As I was pushing the trolley back out to the car with my dozen eggs and two kids a man drove past in his car "put some fucken shoes on your kids, slut!!" He screamed at me.
Yep in front of my kids and for no reason at all he abused me. Miss5 was about 3 at the time and asked me why that man yelled at me. How can I explain that to a 3 year old. "He doesn't like mummy because I'm a young mum" that's not something your children ever need to hear!!

When Miss5 was younger and I was first trying to get some help or a diagnosis for her anxiety I encounter a lot of 'douchebags.' I took her to drs and paediatricians and didn't get much help. Without them directly saying so I could tell they were judging me. More than once I was told my daughter was perfectly fine but I should "takes parenting course, they can really help when your lost."
I wasn't lost, I didn't need a parenting course, I needed help for my daughter. When I finally got decent doctors and got her into some good therapists we got the diagnosis for anxiety. I was also told that therapy was definitely the way to go, NOT a parenting course. The therapist said my parenting was fine, Miss5 had some issues and they needed to be dealt with. It made me feel like dirt when I was told to take a parenting course. I had never thought of myself as a bad parent. But when I was told, more than once, that I would benefit from a parenting course, I started to doubt myself. It's definitely not good for your confidence.

As the kids got older and finally went off to school it was a bit weird for me. All the other mums were nearing 40 years old and I was just entering my 20's. At times they would talk to me as an equal and I would find it strange. Because over the years I had copped so much abuse and judgement from people I found it strange that these mums were treating me as an equal, as just a normal mum with kids at school.
Now really how bad is that? To be treated as an equal by other mums was a weird feeling! That's terrible.

Still sometimes now I find myself in a conversation with late 30's early 40's parents from school and I find myself sitting there thinking 'how bizarre is this, I'm having an adult conversation with someone nearly 20 years older than me, and they think that's normal'

Being pregnant for the third time and I'm finally married. I was looking forward to wearing my wedding rings proudly and shoving them in people faces!! 'Take that you judgemental bitch! I'm married so don't judge me'
Unfortunately I can't even shove my wedding rings in peoples faces....my hands are too swollen to wear them:-(
I'm actually a lot sadder than I thought I would be without my rings on. I can still feel judgemental eyes glancing at my ring finger, wondering if there is a man in my life. I can almost hear people thinking 'she must live on welfare'

I can't wait until this little one is born and I can put my wedding rings on and shove them in everyone's face with pride!! I bloody well deserve to be treated decently. Hubby and I have now been together over 7 years and are married and onto our third kid. We have a house, a dog and at times we have the veggie patch too. We have never received money from the government and never expect to, we have paid our own way everywhere. Of course we have been through our hard times but that doesn't mean he's going to leave me. I'm so sick of people being so surprised that I have a man in my life...and not just a man but the SAME man in my life for all three kids. Is this world so pathetic that for a couple to be together since 16 (and 21) it's such a strange thing and clearly he can't be the father of all my children because that's just so weird.

Yes we stuffed up, getting pregnant so young wasn't in the plan. But that doesn't mean we were both going to run in opposite directions.
Before I got pregnant we were young and happy and enjoying life. Why should we let everything we had fall apart?

I dread the time when my kids are going to ask me what it was like to be a mum at 18. I would NEVER  change anything about my life, but I definitely don't want to have to explain that all my friends ditched me, strangers abused me, old ladies judged me and other shoppers whispered about me behind my back.

When I used to think of teenage mums I always thought "wow imagine being in high school/university and having a baby as well" I thought THAT was the hard part about being a teenage mum. Now that I've done it for myself I think " I wonder if that teenage mum gets the amount of abuse and judgement I had"

I know everyone judges people, shit-at times I do it too! It's part of being human. But after everything I went through as a young unmarried mum I try to stop myself and think 'I don't know their life, their story. Why should I judge them'
Trust me I'm not always successful at that, but I do try. Because I know how much the judgement, abuse and whispering hurt my feelings.
Running home to tell your boyfriend that you got yelled at AGAIN in public in front of your children is embarrassing, I felt ashamed. I hated it. At times I would think 'why doesn't he just leave me, instead of standing here and getting similar treatment to me. If he left me now he wouldn't have to face this bullshit again'

I love my husband. He's my best friend, my life partner and the best person you could ever wish for. He's helpful and caring and is the best dad. We are a team. We always have been. And he's been the one to wipe my tears when I've been crying over the words people say. He's been the one standing tall and proud showing off his kids while I've been nervously standing off to the side aware of how I was being judged.
He's also the one that was there after I had been to a function with super extended family (that technically weren't even related to me) when someone made the comment about the baby (Miss5) being mine but I wasn't married and the 'aunty' turning her nose up saying "ohhhh" walking off and not speaking to me again for the rest of the function. He was there to rant and rage with me when I got home and explained it all to him.

We love our family. We've been through a lot, but it's only made us stronger. We are determined that our family will always be together, we have fought too hard to throw it all away over some stupid judgemental people.

I hope this post has opened your eyes to how hurtful people can be. Even those people always glancing at my ring finger made me nervous-I could tell exactly what they were thinking.

I wish this pregnancy I could wear my wedding rings and see the shocked looks on peoples faces when they see my belly and then automatically glance at my finger and realise I'm married....if only my fingers didn't swell up like sausages :-(

My Kids Aren't the Centre Of My Universe Either....But They Know They Are Loved And Accepted!!

Most of you have probably seen or heard about the blog post going around Facebook at the moment called "This young mother is giving up on her kids and I don't blame her"

Basically it's a mother of a couple of boys who refuses to make her kids absolute centre of the universe, she let's them fail, let's them play cops and robbers in the backyard (which is a BIG no no at schools these days) makes her boys aware that negativity does exist and in fact it's something they will need to learn to deal with.

She goes on to say that people who make their children the absolute centre of the universe and drop everything to tend to their every desire aren't doing their kids any favours.

Of course a blog entry like this is very controversial these days and she has no doubt copped a lot of bullshit from the kind of parents she's talking about. The ones that put their kids in cotton wool and don't let them see, hear or think anything that's not 100% happiness.


Well I'm here to say YOU GO GIRL!!

When I first found out I was pregnant with Miss5 I was given the name of a set of books to read. They are called the Babywise series and have been my life saver.

One of the things it says in the book is that before your child comes along you are already a family. It might just be you and your partner, but you are still a family. Your child will be BECOMING PART OF A FAMILY. They don't MAKE the family, they JOIN the family.

As Stephanie says in her blog post if you drop everything every time your child looks sideways at you how would the dishes ever get done? How would you ever get the clothes washed? If your kids can't find something and you go and find it for them, how will they ever learn responsibility?

Before I was a mother I was Phil's girlfriend. That relationship is an equally important one as the one I have with my kids.
Phil and I are a team. We are parents of two (almost three) amazing children and it takes hard work to raise children.
Therefore we need to nurture our relationship, we need to stay strong, to be a team, to strategise when problems arise.

In the Babywise series of books it suggests for mum and dad to have 'couch time' every single day. Basically it's 15-20 minutes every day where the kids need to play quietly by themselves. They can do a certain pre arranged activity or they can have free play. But they know and understand that mum and dad aren't to be interrupted.
Mum and dad need to sit on the couch/at the kitchen table/wherever comfortable and discuss their day. Keeping topics fairly light, with no serious conversations involving gossip etc.
It's a great time for kids to see a real working relationship, it's a time to work on your communication skills with your spouse and it's a time for the kids to learn that mum and dad are important to each other. During the day mum plays with them, teaches them, let's them have free time, gives them chores etc etc but come 'couch time' mummy and daddy need to have some special time too.


I know of a mum who sends her kids to their grandmothers house every day so that she can go home put on some washing and get the house tidied.
When I first heard that I nearly died on the spot. How can you choose to have kids and then ship them off every time you want to do the slightest thing.
Instead why not teach your child to amuse themselves. Set them up with building blocks, play doh, colouring in. Put a DVD on, or wait until they go down for a nap if all else fails. You're not only teaching your child to occupy themselves, you are teaching them that mummy has chores to do as well. And those chores are important parts of tuning a household. Even better why not involve them in chores, but only sometimes, because ideally they do need to learn to be by themselves.


Stephanie also talks about kids using manners. She writes that her children are ignored when they ask for something without using their manners. The rules in my house are the same. I don't allow my children to get away with demanding something. Even when I'm on the phone they are to find a quiet activity and leave me be. Miss5 once went through a stage of asking me who was on the phone and what they wanted.
I told her that the person called me to speak to me. It was an adult conversation and if it was something that concerned her I would tell her, it's rude to ask people about private conversations.

Have you ever been talking to a friend and their child (or yours) has wanted to ask you a question and they continually tap you on the arm until you answer them?? Yep, well that doesn't happen in my house. It's rude, distracting and not nice. My children are taught to say excuse me and WAIT until I am ready. That's not to say it always happens, they are learning as well. But it's what I teach them.

The other BIG one that gives me the shits is when people having crying babies. Some mums need to understand that sometimes babies just cry-just like sometimes adults just cry. They don't need anything they just need to settle. Overreacting when your child is teething; running into their room every 5 minutes, letting bad behaviour go unpunished because they are sick, letting them sleep in your room and letting them skip a nap/stay up late. YOUR KIDS KNOW WHAT THEY ARE DOING. YES EVEN BABIES DO!! They know your a sucker, and as long as you continue to let them get away with it they will push their limits. When my kids were teething I literally didn't even know. Yes I know teething can be bad, I know fever, drooling, loose nappies/constipation are all side effects. As it says in the Babywise book-"comfort where comfort is needed"
This doesn't mean you suddenly need to rock your baby to sleep, they WILL get stuck in that routine. It means soothe them, but then continue on with your day to day routine. The less attention you pay to the 'problem' the less they will play up. I'm so sick of seeing mothers saying "oh none of us slept because the baby was teething so we had her up all night." Cuddle your kid but then put them down to sleep, trust me they NEED sleep more than most people realise and they will soon settle themselves.


Don't get me wrong I spend plenty of time with my children. I play with them, I help them when they need me, I love and care for them. They KNOW they are loved and appreciated. They KNOW they are a part of a loving, caring family. They KNOW we are always there for them. But they also know that they are part of a family, that bad things happen, that they won't always win every single game, that mummy and daddy's relationship is super important and that sometimes adults need to do tasks by themselves.

So to Stephanie who wrote the original blog-YOU GO GIRL!
And to anyone looking for answers read her blog. The link to the post is on umbrelr.com the post is called "why my kids are NOT the center of my world" but there are plenty of links to the blog all over Facebook at the moment.


Or check out the Babywise books: they are available at all good Christian bookshops (but don't worry they don't drill in the 'God thing' if you don't like that!!) or online like eBay etc. The series starts at Babywise and goes right up to Teen Wise, covering all topics related to each stage of development and how to deal with everything from colic to teething to toilet training, first day of school to mood swings and everything in between.

What's In A Name

Being pregnant this time around is so different. Last time Miss5 was only a baby so she didnt really know what was going on.
Bu this time she's 5 her brother is 3(nearly 4) and it's great fun.

They play with my belly, kiss my belly, poke me to see where their baby sister is sitting and have enjoyed going through baby names with us.

Mr 3 has come up with hundreds of names, all of which I would NEVER name a poor child. His first choice though is Peppa-just like Peppa Pig. Clearly he is a big Peppa Pig fan. Me? Not so much. I think Peppa is a great name for a puppy, a pig, even a horse-not so much for a baby.

Miss5 is dying to name the baby Olivia. She came up with this name all by herself which I think is amazing because Olivia was one of our top picks when naming her!! Spooky huh?!

Anyway Olivia isn't on our short list this time. In fact hubby has chosen the top name for this baby (there's a funny story behind that but I'll explain that once the little one is here)

We have tried asking Miss5 what she thinks of all our top names, but so far she's determined her sister will be called Olivia.

The other night at dinner we were again discussing baby names and I happened to say to Miss5 "what happens if mummy and daddy decide to call this baby something else. Not Olivia"

"Well then I won't like her" Miss5 stubbornly told me.

"I'm sure you will love her no matter what her name is" I tried to reason.

"No I just want her to be Olivia" her arms were folded, her bottom lip dropped, she is determined this kid will be Olivia.

Well I guess in 9 weeks time we will find out what she REALLY thinks of her little sister with a name she 'doesn't approve of'



Did your older children help when choosing names for a younger sibling? Did they like/dislike the names you chose? Did you make it a family decision you ALL had to agree on before naming the newest addition?



When naming all three of our babies we have had to choose carefully what names make our list. Having Currie as a last name makes things a bit tricky. For example I love Josh for a boys name but then 'rogan josh' is a type of curry, so that would be awkward. We need to make sure nothing silly can be made out of the names, I would hate for our kids to be teased over their name. Although this whole weird names thing is becoming quite a fashion these days, there are way better names out there to be teased about 'Apple' 'Pixie' 'Peaches' 'Sailor' yeah that's weird, I hope those kids get teased before my little Curries do...although I don't REALLY wish anyone to be teased.


Do you have an interesting family name? Do you have any traditions when naming your children? Do you name all your children with the same letter in the first name? Or the same amount of letters? Maybe you like rhyming names? What's the story behind naming your children?